Tony Robbins NLP guru and agent of change says “your success is proportionally related to your capacity to withstand discomfort”. Let us look at that today.
We humans repeat behaviour whether the particular behaviour is beneficial to us or not, both in business and in our personal lives. This is what popularly has become known as the comfort zone. I have often heard John Grinder (Co-creator of NLP) say that: “If you always do what you have always done, you always get what you always got” in my course with Joseph O’Connor in Coaching the brain (neuroscience applied to Coaching) I have learned what happens in the brain for us to do this. Our brain creates neurological pathways and the more we repeat behaviour the stronger that neurological pathway becomes, in other words, for better or worse, these become habits. It is easier to walk down the path that has already been trotted in the forest, however, if we always choose the same path we will always see the same part of the forest and maybe we will always trip over the same stone, get muddy shoes in the same puddle and hit our head on the same branch. Or, we can watch how the forest changes and enjoy the growth and flowers blooming. This knowledge becomes relevant in coaching sportspeople, companies, and relationships and when we look at addictions.
NLP is about creating choices for our clients and for ourselves, whether they are companies, individuals or families. To create new pathways and lead our clients out of their comfort zone, where the change happens, using the neuroplasticity in the client’s favour.
Moreover, in the relation to our goals and venturing outside the comfort zone we are more afraid of what we have to lose than we are focusing of what we have to gain.
Joseph O’Connor uses the example that many businesses find it so difficult to let go of a project that they have invested a lot of time of money in but no matter how they approach it, it is not successful and they can’t get themselves to cut their losses. He continues by explaining that it is the same thing that happens when we invest in stocks and we don’t sell when they begin to lose, we hold on hoping they will rise again instead of selling and moving on to other stock. As he says this I can’t help but think to myself that this is also relevant to the fact that many people stay in relationships even when it has become evident that they are not functioning anymore. It is relevant in all the parents who come and see me and wonder why they can’t get through to they children when they are always saying and doing the same thing. It is relevant in the people who come and see me because they want to lose weight and they don’t understand that repeating the same habits over and over again does not get you new results.
So when we are looking to create and reach new goals, whether it is in sport, business or in our personal life we have to create new pathways and cut our losses, which is exactly the opposite of what our brain is wired to do and that is what makes it extra difficult to step out of the comfort zone and step into the unknown. On, my mind and body balance retreat, we focus on creating new goals and begin to trot new pathways so we can avoid tripping over the same stone, getting our shoes muddy in the same puddle and hitting our head on the same branch.
I hope to see you there: Have a fantastic week and be kind, it is free.
Best wishes,
Ivalo